It’s not often that one is wooed by a blog, and yet this is what happened to me when I stumbled upon Stories And Hugs which I recommend most people involved in educating kids should visit.
So impressed was I that I asked Yolanda Panda to write an article about parenting. Here it is:
What is parenting? It’s incredible how you can ask a bunch of different people that question and you will most probably get different answers but with the same meaning. Being a parent isn’t necessarily being the biological mother or father. A parent can come in all different forms.
Adults normally adopt a parental role with a child even if they themselves don’t have kids. Being a teacher is basically being a parent for lots of different kids. Being a mother, you get that nurturing instinct and are automatically aware of every child’s safety.
So, is there an overall way of being a good parent and if so, what is it?
I think the main thing, is unconditional love. If a child has that then they have the ability and belief that they can concur anything they set out to achieve. We have to spread the love! But also stability and discipline. A child needs structure in their life and challenge. Allowing a child to achieve something is a spectacular thing, but also allowing them to fail is something special too, and it’s ok. It’s a part of life and we all have to learn the lessons in life and grow from them.
Parenting is a personal thing and each person will bring up their child in a way that best fits them. It can be the way they were brought up. And on many occasions things they learned from their own upbringings that they perhaps didn’t like and sought to change.
But with all parenting duties there are some things that are vital in the household. And depending on your financial stand in society, it may be easier for some and harder for others. But either way it can be achieved.
It is the “parents” responsibility to provide an education for their child. Books are such fantastic things. One thing that is amazing about reading a book is every person takes away something different from it. Kids love stories and I have found that a story can sometimes grab their attention in ways that are difficult to be surpassed by other methods. In my blog for example I write Kids Stories short poems, which are mostly Moral Stories For Kids, on any number of subjects. Stories allow a child to be imaginative, creative, and learn extraordinary things. The education is limitless. And luckily books for kids are cheap. So for those households who can’t always afford as much as others, books are one of the things that should be easier to get. There are libraries with unlimited amounts of books to read for free.
Toys or art supplies or anything that gives a child something to manipulate and explore is another vital thing to have in the house. These are things that kids need to have in order to learn, especially at a young age. Kids need to be able to use their 5 senses and anything you have around the house to help them is all that much better.
Communication is something that should be expressed daily. Allowing a child to express themselves is extremely important in their growth, even when at times you may not want to hear it. A parent must always be aware of how they react to certain things. It is amazing how much a child picks up on and the things that they remember growing up. So being conscious of your behavior is a vital role in parenting.
Having guidelines and rules in the house is also important. I have already talked about Moral Stories for every child and the truth is, children need to have boundaries. It’s just the way of living and growing up. Even adults have to know their boundaries. They need them at work, when socializing and even with their own kids.
Rewarding a child and letting them know when they did something that made you proud is something that should be expressed often in your household. Giving your child something extra to show how much they made you proud will encourage them and make them feel good and give them reasons to continue on that positive path.
There are so many different things that should be done when being a parent. But the last thing that I will mention is affection. Giving your child a hug everyday is so important. And picking up on when the right time your child needs it is is also just as important. Smiling to them, kissing them and being playful with them are also different ways of showing them affection.
So be the best you can be so that your child can concur the world and be the best they can be. And remember, being a parent means putting them first and yourself second. It is the most selfless act and something to be proud of.
I just wanted to thank you Dr. Dad for asking me to write an article on parenting. I have had the chance to work with kids for over 10 years now and feel I have learned so much about what a child needs and how they should receive it. I’m so passionate about kids and how they learn that I truly enjoy what I do. Thank you for showing an interest in my site and I look forward to receiving your warm comments and also reading your great articles. A lot of what you write about also affects the lives of the kids involved (if there are any). So keep up the good advice!
All the best,
Yolanda Panda
[Reply]
Dr. Dad Reply:
November 18th, 2011 at 9:44 pm
You are more than welcome Yolanda. Having subscribed to your site, I know how great your stories are and I can tell you the one you wrote for one my kid has made her day! I hope many of my readers will check your site out and find out about how you can write personalized kids stories that truly touch the heart!
[Reply]
Hi!
Thanks for sharing the information about parenting and the new blog. When there was a five year old kid living in my neighborhood and I was 18, I assumed a parental role and developed a deep relationship with that kid. As I am about to become a parent next year, I wonder how I will balance love and discipline. Instilling morals from a small age is very essential, hence I believe these moral stories would be helpful as kids love stories.
Regards,
John
[Reply]
I believe that a child needs lot of affection and care in the initial years of growth. You are right hugs are a great way to convey that you love your child very much. As a child I remember that my mom used to hug me as soon as I used to return from school. Moral stories help a child in knowing his/her own boundaries and may also help them when they grow up.
[Reply]
Hi Stevie and Yolanda,
Great idea to have Yolanda write an article for your blog, Stevie. As Dr. Dad, it fits so very well.
I love that Yolanda emphasized unconditional love as the main thing. I do believe that that alone can solve so many issues that may come up. When we go deep and don’t just stay on the surface of what is happening, we, as parents, find that feeling of unconditional love. It is always there and can be expressed when we really take the time to decide the best way to address any situation. Thanks, Yolanda, for making that vital point and I also loved all your other important parenting tips.
Thanks again Stevie for bringing this great information on parenting… much appreciated!
(Dave) and Dawn
[Reply]
I completely agree about parenting not necessarily being the biological parent. We are all mentors in a way to our young generation. The thing is what kind of mentors we want to be, because children do what they see us doing, not what we say. Thanks to share such a powerful message.
[Reply]
Dr. Dad Reply:
November 22nd, 2011 at 9:49 pm
We are all the children’s parents!
[Reply]
Hi Yolanda:
These are great tips and suggestions on parenting. As a dad of three beautiful daughter’s you have given me some great inspiration.
Thanks!
Kevin
[Reply]
Hi Steve,
This is a great post, with lots of valuable information.
As father of a 5 year old, I can attest that unconditional love is key to child development, and reading to her every night is really accelerating her growth.
We did a star chart with a reward and then were told that this was a bad idea! I am interested in the thoughts of others on this. I can understand that rewards are good for carrying out takss, but maybe it can be misused to conditoin them to a fixed way of thinking?
[Reply]
Unconditional love is so important! It is one way of providing security, also much needed by children.
As the mother of 7 children, 5 of whom are in their 20s, I often tell younger moms, “Choose your battles wisely, and don’t sweat the small stuff.” If streaking their hair wild colours and wearing lots of metal jewellery is the worst they ever do, count your blessings! It’s what is in their hearts that counts. Love them no matter what, and you will always have their hearts.
Willena Flewelling
[Reply]
Pick your battles. Befor my 3 could walk, I made up a few rules that I wasn’t going to back down from as long as I lived! You have to go with what works for you and your family, but try to think of what you just won’t stand for. Please try to understand there is some things they can’t change about the thereselfs. Just listen and love them for who they are and everthing will fall in place.
[Reply]
i run a review blog publishing evaluations of the most up-to-date in reducing stress, that is most likely likely to be of interest to subscribers of this post. nice post
[Reply]
Dr. Dad Reply:
December 1st, 2011 at 9:39 pm
Thank you!
[Reply]
the fact that each one of us get diffrent education, is the reason that there is too many wars. i believe the education should be global. this way people will feel connected without any need of religion.
i believe that the parent can influence his children just a little bit. cause this days usally the children are not spending enough time with thier parents, so the best place to put him is in good Of values enviorment.
[Reply]
Love the article on parenting! I have 2 young grand-children ( 2 and almost 4 years), and I’m so proud of the way my daughter and her husband bring them up. They certainly do have unconditional love! I seem to have a lot more patience with them than I did with my own children, I can sit and play with them for hours!
thanks for the good read, Julieanne
[Reply]
Loved this article on parenting. Being a mom to three boys has been the most rewarding and joyful experience in my life. I am proud of them and all they bring to my life. Learning how to guide them along their god-destined path is a challenge I have embraced fully with many mistakes and stumbles along the way. Guiding them and molding them at the same time as keeping their free spirits alive is a fascinating and evolving process. I love the changing challenges as they grow. We are just entering the teen years and I am excited about it. I don’t dread them rebelling, I relish the chance to hear their individual thoughts and expressions. I have kept strong boundaries in my home and they know right from wrong. I used a reward chart and I have rewarded them for good behavior throughout their young lives. It has stood us in good stead thus far.
Clare
[Reply]
Dr. Dad Reply:
December 7th, 2011 at 3:34 pm
Teens hey! Good luck!
It will be a challenging time but one which will reward you no end, just as every other periods of their life our little ones go through! (Even when they are no longer “little”!)
[Reply]
It’s a great article on parenting. One of the best things to teach a child is an optimistic attitude. It’s a kind of confidence that would help prepare a person to face a busy world.
[Reply]
One of the best values parents must inculcate in their children is the importance of communication. This is not just practiced through verbal policies and commands; it’s also about sharing one’s opinions and ideas with each other.
[Reply]
Great goods from you, man. I have be aware your stuff previous to and you are simply extremely excellent. I actually like what you’ve acquired here, certainly like what you are saying and the way in which during which you assert it. You make it enjoyable and you still take care of to stay it wise. I can’t wait to read much more from you. That is really a tremendous site.
[Reply]
Dr. Dad Reply:
January 17th, 2012 at 3:41 pm
I also like “the way in which during which you assert” yourself.
[Reply]