About me

If you are really interested, here are some bits of information about me.

My name is Stevie, and I am 53. At the age of 22, I met an incredible woman who for some reason or another bought into my charms and agreed to marry me.

This wonderful lady became the mother of my two daughters, but it soon became obvious to her that I was not the man for her, not least because like most young men, I believed in my own invincibility. I was categorical, and stubborn. In other words, I was young and stupid.

My first wife stuck with me as long as she could and then 7 years later, as the 7 year pinch set in, we decided that time had come to give our life together a break. We were divorced soon after.

As we went our separate ways, I joined the dating market at a time when there were no online dating sites and you actually had to either know someone who knew someone, or pick up the courage and ask a co worker out, or someone you met in a bar, pub or at a friends house.

Thus started one the most useless periods of my life as I was blinded by the incredible discovery that there were ladies out there who were still willing to give me a chance and go out with me.

Man seldom willingly learns though, but as luck would have it, with the passing of weeks and months, some unknown wisdom I didn’t know I had made me question the real purpose of my life.  All of a sudden, I was no longer the big shot I thought I was.

Then, just like that lady luck took pity on me once more and threw me down the path of my second wife, a true angel if ever there was one, quite literally since 10 years later she would pass away into the next world from the effect of a long and arduous battle against cancer.

In spite of the challenges that her health put in front of us, I experienced with her some of the happiest times of my life.  With her illness came the realization that life in spite of everything else can be exactly what we make it to be.  Like many who have gone (or are going through) the same, we decided that we would make the  most of every day that life gave us, and accept every thing with gratitude, even the obstacles.  This attitude seemed to be working a treat as well since my wife outlived the prognosis of her doctors by nearly 7 years.

With her help and unrelenting love which even at her weakest she was never short of showing, she turned me into a man. It was an experience unlike any I had ever undergone before and the more I changed the more I began to see what love meant and its true potential.

She helped me realize that I could only be the sum of all the ladies who had shared my life, without whom I would certainly be a different person today.  Above all, she taught me that in love, you get what you give.  The more love she gave me, the more I gave back, and so on and so for until love became what defined us.

Then, just like that she passed away.  After her death, I entered a phase which you can at best characterize as the most painful in my life. As many of you will know, losing someone you love is a hardship like none others. But throughout this difficult time, when I was at the point of destruction I kept on asking myself this simple question: “What would she do if she was me?”

Having experienced her calm and reassuring behavior, even in the midst of the worst that her illness sometimes threw at her, it was as if she was still guiding me, helping me, soothing me. Even in death, I realized that she was still a part of my life, and I began to look upon death as something else than what we westerners often associate it with. Indeed, it was an ending, but not the end.

And as this new found truth began to sow healing throughout me, I started to date again.  I joined a dating site, and…

Just like that I met yet another incredible woman who saw past my ineptitudes and agreed to marry me.

Some say that love is a complicated thing that most of us don’t understand. I have come to learn that love can be as simple, or as complicated as we make it.

Above all, at the old ripe age of 50 something, I now know that love takes effort.  But if you are willing to make the effort, if you are willing to love as well as you can, truly love, then the rewards that will be yours cannot possible be measured.

I hope you and I can have a conversation and share some of our experiences together.  I welcome your thoughts and ideas and above all I hope that you continue to love your partner as much as you can!